i feel like shit but i’m too tired to cry lmao

Anonymous said: Lets get baked together , watch adventure time and dress up in silly clothes. Back tickles are available and and smoke until our lungs were blacker then yesterday :)

i’m so okay with this :)) and back tickles are my fave tbh haha

i’m so fucking baked rn and i’m watching lever’s band practice ((metal band lmao)) and i feel like a groupie hahaha

does anyone remember my old bff lever who i was best friends with for years?????? well we had a big falling out almost a year ago now wow but the other day we made nice and now i’m seeing him timorrow ((finally)) !!!! i’m so happy omfg i’ve missed my old friends so much

pro tip: don’t listen to any of coldplays sad lovey songs at 3am when you’re already sad and super tired bc you will be left in tears and you will want to die

i hate everything and i have so many things on my mind rn but w/e bc it doesn’t matter and i don’t matter

guess who finally has a social life again??? that’s right i do omg for the first time in forever i’m busy every single day this week and i’m seeing friends jfc i’m so excited yay

my god i hate crying

the best kind of retail therapy is lingerie and sex toy shopping omfg so much money gone and i’m so fucking happy :))

i got up a couple of hours ago and just spent ages throwing up jfc whats wrong with me this time

goodbye surprisingly decent mood that lasted a couple of hours and hello sadness and tears. painkillers pls knock me out asap so i don’t have to feel anymore lmao

((also someone pls remind me later to talk to someone about my painkillers k thx))

i feel like everyone hates me and that everyone is just angry at me and disappointed in me. its killing me tbh

counting people for my birthday and so far the number i have is 0

looks like i’ll be spending my birthday alone and unloved and unwanted but hey it’s just like any other day lmao

i don’t even really wanna go to town anymore but no matter what i do people still won’t come and i’m already fucking shattered and angry

its my fucking birthday ffs

oh btw its not actually my bday today, its the 4th october lol

being left behind is a really hard thing to deal with and i fucking hate everything bye

so i just went down to the corner shop to get smokes and on the way i passed a man who didn’t look very friendly but when i walked past him he looked at my bandaged arm and said he hopes my arm gets better and idk it made me smile. its the little things tbh

last week i was so excited for my birthday bc i was gonna go out with my friends and party and shit ((i’ve only been out once bc anxiety but i was so looking forward to this))

now none of my friends are coming. i don’t even want a stupid birthday anymore and oh hello tears. this is just fab

this is going to be the worst fucking birthday ever, what’s even the point. i don’t matter and no matter what i do, no one will come anyway

so done bye.

Neko