Fighting urges is so mf hard
I’m so overwhelmed with negative emotions and anxiety about everything I ate today, going back to school tomorrow after a week off and then the school camp on Thursday/Friday.
I’m trying to use my wise mind to ground myself and I’m even trying to urge surf my self harm urges but it’s not working
I’ll probably end up self harming. I’m such a failure
yesterday my mum told me the scars on my arms are looking a lot better
I’m not going to self harm tonight, I’m going to hopefully sleep. I just had an electrolyte filled iceblock and some painkillers which will hopefully make me feel better
I’m not going to self harm tomorrow (I’m having a picnic with my girlfriend) and on Thursday (it’s my birthday) because I don’t want to ruin those two days
That’s five days in total without self harming
I saw my sexual assault psychologist today
My little cousins are asking questions about my cuts and scars.
trigger warning: do not read if you are easily triggered
this is super long and boring and just me venting about all my issues at the moment. just ignore this lol